He passed out mid-signature
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
they're like a gay fantastic four
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Randomize
