Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
My liver just had a heart attack.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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