glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Randomize