her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Redeem this text for a blowjob
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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