I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. Sheβll growl when she smells good dick
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ππππ
Randomize