can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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