That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize