you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Randomize