me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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