So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
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