I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize
