can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Randomize
