margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
Even the bartender felt bad for me
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
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