What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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