she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Randomize
