Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
