some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
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