ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize