your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
