I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize