He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Randomize
