he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
