cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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