we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
