How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Congratulations! We have a period
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
