Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
