maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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