it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Randomize
