i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Randomize
