Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
