I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize