i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
