Non-Jews are for practice
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
