ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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