well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
