So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
Randomize
