so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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