I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
