I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Randomize
