so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
