Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Randomize
