The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Let's paint friendship bongs
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
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