Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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