First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
