I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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