last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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