And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Actions speak louder than pants.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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