did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
