you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
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