making cat noises will not fix the situation.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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