I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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