Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
