no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
